Easter, Passover, St.Patrick’s Day, Birthdays, Anniversaries.. during a pandemic!
So we made it through St. Patrick’s Day with the new stay at home situation. For some it was just another day but for Irish families it may have meant sacrificing traditional celebrations with Irish soda bread, parades, and beer of course!
This stay-at-home order is for our health, and the health and safety of many of our friends and neighbors. But it leaves us with many void days, and special traditions being sacrifices. It may feel heartbreaking. For some it feels very lonely as you live alone and only have a bright screen to see your loved ones through.
First I want to say it is OK to feel down about this!!
Some people might shame you, YOU shame yourself with feelings of guilt that this is getting to you. Because ultimately, you are well and still have SO MUCH to be grateful for. This is TRUE, but…
First you need to allow yourself to feel your emotions. Whatever they may be! And there are likely lots of different feelings now (and every day, right?!)
There is great importance in allowing yourself to feel your emotions.
Sweeping them under the rug will only make for a big pile of dirt to trip over!!!!
Give yourself a few moments to feel those feelings. Get in touch with where they come from. Recognize the triggers, such as holidays or special events – a time you would like to be celebrating with loved ones in a special way, and you can’t. Allow yourself time to think of the past and remember this day last year, 5 years ago, 10 years ago. You are likely to have many changes that have occurred over the years. Reflect on that and allow yourself to sit with those emotions for a bit. This is what we therapists call processing your feelings. And it is completely healthy! Takes few deep breaths, feel the oxygen fill your lungs, feel your muscles relax.
Now it’s time to move!
Move through the difficult or complicated emotions. And work towards gratitude. This is one of the best ways to work past negative emotions!
No matter what your situation is right now you have something to be grateful for!
If you are home alone, you can be grateful for the time to process your emotions and not be frustrated or distracted by roommates or family. Let’s be real – just about anyone can get under your skin if you are together 24/7. If you are in the house with kids who are bored and rambunctious from weeks without friends or school, be grateful for your health! The fact that you aren’t socializing means you aren’t just avoiding COVID-19, but you are also avoiding all those other colds kids typically catch and pass around. If you are sad you ran out of chocolate, be grateful you have toilet paper! (I bet you never would have thought of that as something you would be grateful for!)
In gratitude we are able to give ourselves perspective! Perspective allows you to change your emotions about a situation. Then the glass half empty becomes a glass half full!!
This is a key to life that will allow you to turn any negative situation into a positive one!
Change doesn’t come from outside – we can’t control any of that stuff – change comes from inside!
Share love with other people in any way you can! Think thoughts of gratitude and focus your attention on things you are happy and grateful for. And this will help you feel better about any holiday or special occasion during this pandemic.
With Love,
Bettina
